Chastity belt, would you wear one if your domme told you to?

So what do think of them? Would you wear one if your domme told you to? Because I wouldn’t. The bottom line I don’t cheat and I won’t lie. Making somebody wear a chastity belt is a sign of insecurity on the part of the person who makes them wear it


  • Respectfully, I disagree that it is a sign of insecurity, nor do I think it is primarily to prevent lying or cheating. I’ve never experienced a chastity device, but I would view it in the same way that I view bondage. I love bondage, but in most cases, the same result (preventing me from escaping or hiding/protecting myself) could be achieved simply by instructing me not to. Yet the bondage is still intensely powerful. It’s physical, I can feel the helplessness and vulnerability, and I can struggle against it (safe in the knowledge that I’m not going to escape ;-). A chastity device exerts control in a different way, but I think it’s fundamentally the same thing – a physical manifestation of the exchange of power.
  • “Making somebody wear a chastity belt is a sign of insecurity on the part of the person who makes them wear it”

That seems pretty black and white to me. A Domme who “made” an unwilling sub wear one doesn’t sound like a very good domme to me. Frankly, wearing a chastity belt wouldn’t stop someone from cheating who really wanted to anyways. And why would someone who was cheating agree to wear one? I think this misses the point of wearing a CB completely. I don’t think most Dommes who ask their subs to wear a CB are doing it because they think their sub will cheat on them… but since I’m not a Domme you’ll have to ask someone else about their motivation in that regard…

Personally, I find the idea of being locked in a chastity belt exciting for the same reasons I find submission exciting… it’s a form of giving up control, and of giving that control another person. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg… not being able to get sexual release while also being constantly reminded of my predicament keeps me horny for days on end. It also keeps my mind on my keyholder.

  • The devices have some problems, they don’t fit everybody and most people who have tried say that they can be removed unless held in place by a piercing. However, some Dommes like the implied force, and some guys like it too. When I’ve worn one it was like having her hand on me all the time- very nice. Unfortunately I’m one of those that hasn’t been able to find a way to make one fit well enough to stay on, so when I’ve done chastity for extended periods it has been on the honor system.

Chastity play, whether with a device or not, is incredibly intimate, and I would suggest that extended chastity never be done outside of a strong relationship with trust on both sides. I don’t know if other guys are like me, but for me it gives an incredible amount of power to the Domme. That’s dangerous unless she understands that and has a real commitment to the relationship.

  • I have never put a chastity device on a man who didn’t first beg me to do it… who didn’t find release in it the same way other slaves find release on other kinds of bondage.

It isn’t about trust. It’s about security, about feeling your Mistress with you all the time, about not having to make the choices yourself.

Personally, I’m not crazy about them… they are always a pain to get off and I like my boys available for my use. But I have owned men who found them a much-needed comfort and always been moved by the weight that seems lifted from their shoulders when the device is locked into place.

  • This is actually one of my “hot buttons” as I do NOT get how a dominant can claim to be dominant when it is the subs’ idea to “help them” keep their hands off them. It is pandering to THIER fetish nothing less.

I only own an adult male and when I say “do not” I expect and get obedinece or they can leave. I do not have the time to play games that are “please keep me in chastity dso I can do better” as that is toping from the bottom.

The exception is when the Domme decides to do it without being begged to or pressured into it to enforce “obedience” that is nothing of the kind.

I do not think it is a lack of confidence in the mind of the person giving the order to wear chastity. In 98% of the time it is a lack of trust in the person who is wearing the chastity device. I do NOT understand a relationship that has as part of it a lack of trust.

  • Male chastity is one of my fetishes. I just love that degree of control over what is at the core of most male identities. Fortunately, many males share the desire for being controlled in this way too.

My sub/husband is slowly coming round to agreeing to wear a chastity device, it has been over a year since we started talking about it and it is not something I would enforce on an unwilling partner. He knows his submission is at its best when his release is under my control and like many males he also finds it hard to resist the temptation to take matters into his own hands (pun intended) 🙂

The OP sounds like he has been unduly pressured to wear a device and that would, of course, be a no-no. The device itself is probably not the issue.

  • I believe that the giving of and wearing a chastity belt has nothing to do with lying and or cheating. For Myself and my submissive, I think it’s a way to control his urges to play with himself without Me, and if he can’t get to “the toy” he can’t play with it, ok I’m sure that some Dom’s use the chastity belt to protect what is theirs or to keep their submissive from acting out as some who shall remain nameless are want to do. but on the whole I believe that using a chastity belt is personal to the Top/bottom and should be used with care to the one wearing it. It indeed can be something fun and or controlling for the sub, and this makes the Dom happy and so this makes the sub happy! see its not all bad! ~~~ kisses~~~
  • I would also like to state that I have not chosen to use a chastity device as i choose will power over desire and my submissive is indeed bound I will not to touch, and or play unless I ive him permission to do so and since he and i live like 2000 miles apart it has to be bound by my will in the year we have been together with realtime meetings he has never broken my trust or breaking the bond I put on him to play NEVER.. so i think for those that enjoy them chastity belts are fun and even erotic but if you don’t need one them more power to you for your own overcoming that desire to play with that which does not belong to you!
  • This one is the one that Mistress DarkSebille is talking about, and yes with the trust She and this boy has, I am bound by Her will and Her commands and even though we spoke about it and I would not mind havening chastity on me and Her haven one key and me another, and only being let out when She says, I am happier in that I have chosen to be bound by Her will not to play unless given permission by Her, thus, increasing the trust level between us over the 2,000 miles that separate us. it is, is the trust and Her commands that i take as my own commands and lock them in to my mind, and i know if i break that command this boy is in big trouble with Her. and boy does not want that to happen ever so is obedient always for wants to have fun with Her next visit not have to have Her punish me during the visit. okay, I am rambling. and that is my two cents worth.
  • Like all things in the lifestyle, the possibilities are infinite and means different things to different people. Perhaps there are some who will allow Topping from the bottom. Perhaps some are insecure who lock people away. However, that said, I will give you My perception on WHY I adore chastity. One does not make someone go into chastity. It is always negotiated. It is R.A.C.K.

Male ego is often centered on his cock. In the right relationship, that being one of infinite trust, a male sub or slave giving control over his cock to his Dominant, is in fact relinquishing the last vestiges of any power over their own body. While bestowing the greatest gift and ultimate power to his Dominant.

I neither suffer from insecurity nor do I lack trust in the one I place in chastity. It is because I do trust them, that I desire this control. Complete and absolute. My cock.. My balls. MINE! It is his choice to suffer for me.. To please me. It is a subtle physical reminder to him that I own the soft delicate organ to do with when and how I please.

Yes, one can be told not to touch and trusted that they will honor their word. That is not the point in Chastity.

I derive great pleasure from knowing my words or actions will arouse my sub or slave, that his cock will start to react, only to feel the encasement. That the limited space does not allow much of an erection and will ultimately cause discomfort. It is the TEASE & DENIAL. Ergo: his suffering to me, for me, to please and delight me. It is the mental (psychological) effect of this physical bondage that will actually make the individual feel completely owned, controlled and loved. Suffering in all ways for someone you care about and wish to show great homage.

Those of us who do this and are knowledgeable of this type of intimate interaction, are fully aware of the vast responsibilities it encompasses. One cannot simply lock someone up and think that is the end of it. There is proper care, keeping, cleanliness and release.

A male must be released and either milked or made to climax in order to keep everything functioning properly. Especially when a male reaches the age of 50 or older. So you see, locking one in chastity actually brings with it, much more responsibility on both parts.

  • I think it would feel like having her hand in my pants at all times, gently in control, and I think it would be wonderful. With her “hand” (the device) it the way, I couldn’t touch myself, which would be frustrating. But then again, it would be reassuring to feel her there all the time, telling me that she wanted my attention, my obdience, my maleness. It would feel my sexuality was being honored, in a wonderfully pervy way.

I love the way @Terp put it, more like a security blanket than a security device – or a little of both 😉 It’s a symbol of ownership, like a collar. To each their own.

no one makes us do anything, not really. It sounds like not feeling trusted might be an issue for you. I know that’s an important part of feeling respected, at least for me. Maybe honor-system chastity would work better for you, if you chose to engage in chastity play?

  • With all due respect tyke.. submission is the act of serving within preset negotiated limits. It has nothing whatsoever to do with respect in general. That said, a sub negotiates what he will and will not accept as: not only his limits, but his hard limits. A sub set limits.

A slave on the other hand serves from obedience, will negotiate once, and will not set limitations on the dominant beyond what has been negotiated. KEY WORD: Negotiated.

I don’t think any of us dominants feel that we should automatically be served out of respect. Respect of what? That I am a dominant? I know I don’t. I want to EARN that respect. I want to be served out of Trust, Loyalty, Obedience, and Love. Once I earn that right from an individual.

The lifestyle being infinite, it is never just Black & White. What may seem right for you, may not be right for others and vise versa. An individuals perception has a lot to do with the tenets of the specific lifestyle they follow or adhere to.

There are Lifestylers, Kinksters, Hedonists, Leather folks, Wiccan, Biblical, Gor.. to name a few. There are those of us who do view this as a lifestyle.. and yet those who believe it is not. That does not make either right or wrong. It is what works for the individual. THAT is what we must be accepting of. The individual choice as it pertains to their choices of lifestyle or kink.

Also keep in mind, how you interpret someone’s post is always contingent on how you perceive the words.

__Another example of how the Internet has undermined the foundation of this lifestyle. People who can’t separate their own selfish desires from the true essence of Dominance and submission.__

Here, I feel that here you are confusing an issue. Not everyone is a Lifestyler. Please don’t confuse a Kinksters’ attitude and actions with that of a Lifestyler. There are Kinksters who play in the realm of BDSM for the kink and nothing more. While there are those who profess to be Kinksters and play on the fringes as hedonists, only using certain Kink to enhance the pleasure they seek. Generally sexual in nature.

While not attempting to derail the thread, you also have to look at what doge stated. He said: “I am well aware of what submission means But chastity devices are simply a no-no for me __at the moment.__ But that could change over time. Who knows? people grow and evolve all the time. what is a hard limit today may become less so over time.”

One could not ask for more open honesty and reality. Because as we get to know an individual and trust grows between them, their limitations and hard limits change. They evolve with the RIGHT counterpart.

As a Lifestyle dominant, I personally feel it is every sub or slave RIGHT to understand the personality type, experience level, outlook, tenets and genre that dominant enjoys playing in, in order to ascertain if they are a good match. Remember a sub or slave is ultimately trusting with their life. Just because one is a sub or slave does not mean they are so to just anyone or everyone. Please consider this.

  • without controlling the whole sexuality of a man you shouldn’t even think about having control. taking control as main issue there is nothing comparable with chastity devices. they are concrete and pure reality in stopping the most popular hobby of nearly every man, to masturbate – there are many statistics on the male behaviour and to masturbate two times a day is usual among men, regardless if living in a relationship or not. second, it is a living symbol of submission: if one has to prove himself as being a real man the errected phallus is the common sign for it. imagine a football team taking a shower and one guy was coming locked up. personally i cannot imagine anything in the world evoking such an explosion of a never-ending laughter. and don’t forget, to masturbate is a sort of freedom – you feel yourself and you can let go your thoughts to where you want them to go. this works for reason of getting strong feelings while imagine other women, other siuations whatever. wearing a chastity device even the simple thought of being seduced by an attractive woman turns into an unpleasant idea. stop the many hundred sexual thoughts each man has during the day, lock him up and the man will be hindered to enjoy his thinking on other woman. a man asking his mistress to lock him up is attracted by thinking of doing the ultimate submission – be sure that the reality will be different to most of the men just for the simple reason they cannot play with themselves while being locked up. that is fascinating, in getting what makes submissive men horny like hell they are cutted from taking the pleasure of the imagination.
  • When wearing a chastity device, I know that she has control of me. She can tease me, play with me and know that if I try to think with my other head, it’s not a good thing. They can be used for training, fun, security, control, etc. If you are put into chastity because she wants to, then in you go. If you just met her and she wants to for control and until trust is established, then in you go. If you have to be put in chastity because you can’t be trusted, she has her work cut out for her and might wish to re-evaluate if she can ever trust you.
  • In most cases I would wager that a chastity device is not as much about cheating and lying as it is a part of power play and control. My current partner is not restricted in any way. For now. I trust him not to put his cock anywhere that I wouldn’t approve… but I like knowing that it “belongs” to me. If we were to use a chastity device it wouldn’t be due to reasons of distrust.

Most devices that I have seen are not attractive, most do not fit well, are expensive and I have heard as many say they are uncomfortable as those that claim they are. There are more reasons why we don’t go this route…

  • Mistress requires me to wear a device when it pleases Her. It has nothing to do with worry about lack of fidelity or any other insecurity. Rather, Her ability to lock my cock is the same as Her ability to bind my wrists. It is always present and She exercises it when the whim strikes Her.

As a true slave to Mistress Fishnets, I obey Her requests whatever they are and do not make selections about what orders I will and will not obey. She is both my Mistress and my Wife and I trust anything She chooses for me is best. There are no “hard limits” when I am with Her.

As for chastity devices, I cannot think of a sillier thing to rail against. They are nothing more than mere accessories. The power they have over the slave wearing them is a direct result over how the Domme chooses to use them as Her tool of choice. I love the constant reminder of my slavery and loss of control of my cock when I am locked. Further, I enjoy the freedom all the more when She chooses to grant that as well.